MINNIE LANE

Dating, Attraction and Connection

Coach

10 Best Men's Dating Experts of 2023

ABOUT

Grow more attractive by developing your true self

About

Minnie Lane Dating and Personal Development Coach

Dating and relationships can be challenging for all sorts of reasons, but I'm here to help. I'm a dating and connection coach with over 18 years of experience helping thousands of people worldwide become more attractive versions of themselves and build healthy, fulfilling relationships.

Named a top global dating expert of 2023, my coaching helps with confidence, intimacy, self-worth, conversation skills, connection building, respectful approaching, voice, body language, conflict resolution, dating profiles and online dating. I guide my clients to do the work, providing support, encouragement and fun along the way.

The Approach

I take a holistic approach to dating and relationship coaching, drawing from a bachelors degree in communication and psychology, and MSc research in the psychology of positive relationships. I help my clients understand the dynamics of positive, connection-building communication and guide them through self-development necessary to form healthy, intimate relationships with others.

In addition to psychological insights, my coaching sessions incorporate awareness of the mind-body connection from professional training in meditation, yoga and embodiment. I also draw on wisdom gained from long periods spent living in pitch black solitude (dark retreat) and silent vipassana meditation.

Developing mindset and behaviour simultaneously, I help my clients understand and eliminate the root causes of mental and emotional blocks preventing them from experiencing natural attraction. This is not a quick fix to 'act' more confident by learning lines and routines, but the tools to strip away fears and layers of false self, so you can actually become that confident, naturally attractive version of you.

TESTIMONIALS

The Conversation

You've heard it from me, but good conversation should never be one way. Over to my clients...

Dating Coaching Client London Minnie Lane

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" Minnie brings a delightful combination of a positive attitude, real life experience and a practical application of her knowledge to her development sessions. I came away motivated, with positivity and direction. I would highly recommend her "

- Matthew, 42, UK -

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" When I first met Minnie, I was taken aback by how deep her understanding of attraction went. Like a surgeon, she broke down advice I'd been given elsewhere into fundamental principles. I now have the tools to progress and move forward on my own. If I were to recommend anyone to help a guy out with dating, it would be Minnie"

- Ciaran, 26, Ireland -

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"Minnie is absolutely amazing at what she does. Working with her has been an experience that changed the very fabric of my understanding of human connection.

I highly recommend her to anyone wishing to better themselves in personal life or dating"

- Ranjith, 30, Canada -

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"Simply put, she's amazing. You'll learn a lot from her as I did"

- Al , 27, New Zealand -

Find Out More

Find out more about my one on one coaching sessions or join my mailing list to hear about upcoming events, workshops and dating tips.

Private Coaching

Central London

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Private Coaching

Online

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I'm in the process of writing all my teaching into a book and online tutorials. If you'd like to be notified of publication dates, please join my mailing list or subscribe to my YouTube channel. If you have any questions, I'd love to hear from you.

For media enquiries, please email info@minnie-lane.com.

Join my Mailing List

CONTACT

Contact & Social

@minnielanecoach

info@minnie-lane.com

Ten Days in the Dark

Feb 14, 2023

Coping with Anxiety during Coronavirus

Mar 25, 2020

Letting Go Without Giving Up

Jan 11, 2019

Beautiful camino 🧡
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#300kmofcontemplation #optimisticorangeroads #nuevosamigos #pilgrimage #walkingwithjesus #walkingthroughpain #selfhealingfeet #love #clarity #truth #freedom

We are told that goal-orientated behaviour is key for happiness, but very few people understand the difference between heart-driven goals (rooted in love) and ego-driven goals (rooted in fear).
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The untrained mind struggles to recognise a true (heart) desire from a false (ego) desire, and is often more motivated to seek goals that lead to a short-lived sense of control, safety or validation rather than true, lasting happiness.
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It is often only when we achieve a goal and the temporary high or relief of attaining our goal subsides, that we realise it did not bring the happiness we hoped it would. At this point, many of us will create yet another ego-based goal and make the same mistake again, rather than realising the futility of seeking happiness through the ego and consciously choosing to realign ourselves to love instead.
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So how do we know the difference?
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Our true heart desires are naturally realised by allowing our true feelings into our awareness. True feelings live underneath our false, fear-based feelings because of ‘negativity bias’ - a evolutionary survival strategy in humans whereby we have become conditioned to pay more attention fear-based (perceived) threats than love based (true) desires.
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In order to access our true feelings, we have to be prepared to feel all of our fear-based feelings from a state of acceptance. We observe them and allow them to play out, without believing the stories around them or acting on them, until they pass and reveal our true feelings.
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This process is not a quick fix, but once we connect with our true feelings, our true path of action reveals itself from a state of calm inner knowing. This path may not bring what you *think* you want, but what you need. In truth, there is no difference between what you truly need and what you truly want. The ego will disagree, but your heart will sing with joy, meaning and purpose, if you dare to walk this path.
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If you would like some assistance with this process, feel free to get in touch.

17th March - a lifelong dream to be sat on the second pyramid of Giza, staring at the great pyramid of Giza… contemplating the fact that there are 2.3 million blocks, some weighing up to 80 tonnes… yet our Egyptologist guide just told us they were built by slaves in 20 years?? Ummm…
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I asked AI to divide 2.3 million by 20 years and it informed me that meant one block was laid every 2-3 mins for 20 years. Seemed UNLIKELY.
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When you see the pyramids in the flesh you realise this just can’t be true. It is HUGE. One block of that size would take around 30 people just to MOVE, let alone get up a pyramid and place with perfect precision. I did not buy this story at all and loved the magic of the mystery.
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I’m a bit behind on the news as always, but have just found out that literally the day before this photo, word on the streets is someone has just discovered evidence of possible GIANT underground structures going 2km underground and potentially underground cities? This is BEYOND EXCITING. The current narrative just can’t hold up anymore if this is true.
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I LOVE ancient Egypt. It’s beautiful, fascinating and their knowledge of masculine and feminine energies, architecture and astrology is mind blowing.
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Sadly, we were also told that Egyptian authorities have blocked further investigation. Hope this changes soon, so the wisdom of the past can be revealed and we can bag ourselves another one of those lovely Golden eras 🧡

There are very few problems that can’t be solved with a little trip to magical Mexico. Delivering all the joys as usual. Muchas gracias nuevamente por un viaje muy bonito 🧡

Another successful (ish) trip around the sun! I love that I was born on international men’s day under a full moon. It feels very fitting for my life purpose.
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I’ve had the pleasure of working with thousands of men over the course of my career. Men are often considered the privileged gender, but to see this as black and white is to ignore the fact that suicide is now the leading cause of death for men under 40 in some countries, including the UK.
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In 2023, the male suicide rate in the UK was 17.1 per 100,000, compared to a female rate of 5.6 per 100,000. There are many factors that contribute to this statistic - scientifically researched reasons why men often particularly struggle and many of these reasons are things that can be changed.
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We are living in a time where examples of wounded masculinity dominate the highest positions of power. What the world needs are more examples of mature, developed masculinity.
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The men I have the privilege of working with are the ones who realise that they can learn how to grow, change their lives, change their relationships, tell the truth, act with integrity, support others to grow, and contribute to a better world.
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I hope to see many more men realise they can overcome fears of failure and rejection, fears of losing independence and being taken advantage of. I hope more men realise they can ask for help, improve their communication skills, raise their emotional intelligence, develop conflict resolution skills and improve their ability to face and feel their pain without running, denying or fighting.
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Today, I celebrate my birthday and all the amazing men in my life and around the world.
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#internationalmensday #internationmensday2024 #men #coach #masculinity
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It’s a lot more socially acceptable to be a ‘nice guy’ than a narcissist, but ultimately both these tactics are manipulative strategies rooted in fear (of not getting one’s needs met) that take you out of alignment with your true self.
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Both these defence strategies mask true intentions and motives (often even from oneself) instead of engaging in authentic expression of one’s feelings, experiences, opinions and desires. Only dedication to truth and authenticity will allow your true needs to be met in the long run.
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#narcissist #peoplepleaser #niceguy #dating #truth #authenticity #manipulation #love #alignment

Delighted to guest on the @lovemachinepodcast with El Taco Mágico scratching around and grumbling for maximum professionalism.
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In this episode we discuss how the deep spiritual practice of dark retreats can transform our relationship with ourselves and others. Link in story.
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Blog: Minnie-lane.com > blog > ten days in the dark
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#sensorydeprivation #darkretreat #intimacy #dating #attraction #selflove #love #datingcoach #attraction #podcast

We’re rarely upset for the reasons we think we are. Trying to work out why we’re feeling what we’re feeling can keep us in our heads, instead if in our bodies where the real processing happens.
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Shallow reasoning usually mistakes external triggers as the cause of our emotional experience, but this is really only the top of the iceberg.
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Instead of asking why you’re feeling what you’re feeling, try asking yourself what you’re feeling and where. This keeps your attention with the physical sensations in a state of acceptance and observation. Clarity into why you’re feeling what you’re feeling naturally comes after the feeling has been properly processed.

One of life’s perfect moments 🧡
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Welcome to Europe my beautiful Rupee Mayava 🧡
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#renuion #dogrescue #rupeemayava #love #lookwhosgrown

When it comes down to it, every action we take is either rooted in love or fear. Every moment we have a choice, but only if we are aware enough to recognise it.
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Coaching, therapy and practices like meditation, yoga, breathwork and cognitive reframing can help you develop greater awareness and cognitive strength to remain conscious in the face of fear, instead of being knocked into automatic unconscious defensive behaviours.
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Unconscious behaviours are usually out of alignment with the behaviours we need to create a life we truly love - one in which we are in loving service to the greater good. Often unconscious behaviours achieve the exact opposite results from those we would consciously like to achieve.
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Are your actions helping you grow or keeping you small?

FINALLY en route to collect this magic Sri Lankan Rupee from Brussels airport! A journey which, so far, can only be described as constant spiritual practice.
It’s been 8 months since the (best) decision was made to take this literal doggy bag home from a restaurant in Sri Lanka.

Since then, there’s been a hilarious amount of challenges, not least this past week…

Our ‘overnight trip’ to Brussels to collect Rupee was interrupted as we crossed the channel, by a text saying Rupee had accidentally been booked on the wrong flight and would not be coming to Brussels after all.

Later, we were told she could be put on a flight to Amsterdam the following day, so instead of driving to Brussels to collect a dog, we drove all the way to Brussels just to not collect a dog, and then drove all the way from Brussels to Amsterdam the next day.

As we crossed the Dutch border, we received another text saying unfortunately they hadn’t managed to get her on the flight to Amsterdam either. At this point it was too late to cancel our accommodation, so we drove all the way to Amsterdam just to not collect a dog again.

We are now experts at not collecting dogs from European cities, which is lucky really because that’s exactly the skill we most needed for the last 5 days while Rupee definitely didn’t fly to any.

The good news is there are worse places to be stuck than Amsterdam and we have managed to maintain a sense of humour throughout. We made the most of this impromptu European road trip, not least catching Nils Frahm on the final night of his European tour in Antwerp last night, which was AMAZING.

Hopefully it was the final night of our unplanned Euro tour too, as we have now been assured little Rupee Mayava is ON a flight to Brussels. Hooray! Back we go…

Big thank you to all the wonderful people who have helped us on this wild journey so far, including Vinodh and his sister in law who took care of Rupee for 7 months in Sri Lanka, the dog shelters, @james_page_artwork (who loves a good dog rescue mission) and my very patient clients.

I’ve been wearing the same clothes for a week, but I’m SO excited to see my little girl 🧡

#rupeerescue #dogrescue #srilanka #rescuedog

It feels counter intuitive, but the correct response to toxic behaviour isn’t punishment (which often induces more fear and mistrust), but working to understand the fear at its root and helping the toxic person overcome their fear by learning to trust.

Helping someone build trust varies from one situation to the next. It might look like creating a firm boundary and sticking to it, it might look like listening, it might look like a hug, it might look like saying no, it might look like giving space and time, it might look like saying I love you and meaning it.

Emotional intelligence is the wisdom to discern the deeper need below the surface level toxic behaviour. This insight comes from listening, absorbing, feeling and waiting. Love is the act of giving what is truly needed. To yourself, to the situation, to others.

What is romance? Like so many men, Jamie is confused about how to be romantic with his partner, Kathleen. Afraid of getting it ‘wrong’, he waits for guidance from Kathleen about what she wants from him to be romantic.
The issue is, romance isn’t just doing what someone asks you to do. That’s people pleasing.
Women (like all people) don’t want to be ‘pleased’, they want to be loved. Romance is about taking us beyond what we already know and expect. True love shows us sides of us we’ve never seen before and allows us to relinquish control for a while.
Instead of doing as he’s told or giving Kathleen money she’s asked for, I advised him to think about what he knows about Kathleen that other people don’t know, so he could surprise her with a loving experience unique to her and the relationship in a way that no one else could.
I encouraged him to use his knowledge of what makes her tick, to give her something she hasn’t asked for or take her somewhere she’s never been that he knows will be right up her street. This way, she will feel loved, known, understood and taken care of in ways she hasn’t had to spell out to him.
What intimate knowledge do you have about your partner that you could use to romance them in an unexpected way this week? Even tiny gestures can go a long way in building love, trust and joy in a relationship.
#love #romance #90dayfiance #90dayfiancé #discoverychannel #datingcoach #minnielane #cameo

Magical mornings with my little Mexican monster 🧡

The most accurate diagram of life I’ve ever seen.
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You win the game of life by realising it’s not a competition. The purpose of life is not to win, but to play, learn and grow. To blossom into your highest potential as an individual, which, ironically, is to fully realise your true nature is not an individual at all, but completely and fully one with all life.

#nonattachment #personaldevelopment #coaching

Learning to tell your truth is not as easy as it sounds. First, we have to be aware of the difference between truth and interpretation, then we need to acknowledge our truth, then we need to find the courage to speak up.
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But when we do, everything changes.
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#personaldevelopment #coaching

One year since I met my little velvet Mexican prince and he celebrated with un wee wee on my bed and dos shits on my bedroom floor 🧡 Feliz aniversario mi número uno little boy #love #adventure #happymemories

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@minnielanecoach

MINNIE LANE

Dating, Attraction and Connection

Coach

Grow more attractive by developing your true self

About

The Approach

The Conversation

Find Out More

Private Coaching

Private Coaching

Contact & Social

Ten Days in the Dark

Coping with Anxiety during Coronavirus

Letting Go Without Giving Up

​